backing off the ledge.

saturday morning i found myself standing on the ledge.
it had been a rough bfing week.

santino was sick on monday
& barely nursed.

then i forgot my pump on wednesday
& went an entire day engorged.

i had to break into my golden frozen supply.

santino weighed in at 16lbs 9oz
on monday..
more then double his birth weight
& he's almost sitting.

so we began solids after he was sick.
& added oatmeal cereal
which he thoroughly enjoys over rice cereal.

but to get back to the ledge.
i'm having difficulty keeping up with
the amount of milk he needs while i'm at work.
and i was considering supplementing
with one bottle of formula a day.

but i stood there in front of the formula.
i didn't even know what to look for.
what i could possibly need.
ready to jump off the ledge.

but instead i found myself pumping between every feeding.
trying to up my production.
eating tons of fresh veggies.
& today..
there's four fresh bottles in the fridge
waiting for daycare tomorrow.

i'm not jumping off the ledge today.
& not saying that i'm totally against starting formula..

but i'm so thankful for all the supportive
people in my life..
who've kept me off the ledge for the past 21weeks.